Friday, September 28, 2007

"There, there..." :

I understand,
better than you think.

It was one of those days today,
where at it conclusion,
I wished I were dead.

~~holding myself together;
whispering, "there..there..."

Nothing is ever over,
though, at times, we may wish it were.

{This world is good enough for me,
and you're memories.}

I'm finding myself,
crying;
looking into your eyes, father...

**
I understand, the darkness in your heart.
I understand,

more than you think.....

I'll never gain your trust,
respect.

"there..there..."








good night,
love, Will.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Friends, Frenemy's, Half-Naked Peeps! Lend me your ears! :

This is going to be the last video..after this one,
it's on with other things ~~(What will this be?...we'll see.)



With love, Will.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Film Editing 101: "Spell check the END CREDITS" :

My latest attempt at Political Satire. IT's Saturday Night, in New York City!

enjoy!

"STARR WARS"~~ReTuRn oF ThE LiBs!

Add to My Profile | More Videos

~x~ Will

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Out-Patient....


....11:28 pm. September 20, 2007.

~~There's so much I could tell you, but I won't. Just the facts:.
I'm glad I checked into the hospital.

I didn't stay in, as long as I thought I'd be in~~and, (believe it, or not) even the food tasted good. I've got to STOP smoking (Joining the Program!)~~

The small blood vessels have been effected by the cigs, causing the arteries to work all the harder. Why I ever continued to smoke, (even after a spontaneous collapsed lung. [Well, I did stop for a year. I was 18 years old!]) is beyond me.

~~I've got my Meds under control. Depression is a bitch...(tonight, I'm not even worried about the stigma of Mental Illness) Honesty tells me I'm not alone;...

...not the only only one seeing a doctor, on an Out-patient basis.

(There is so much I could tell you, but I won't)

See you later,

xx, Will.


Sunday, September 16, 2007

Her first Home:

Quiet today. Reflective.

[Just a final note written,
till I return. ]
~~Here's a poem I wrote, a while back.
It's a poem about my mom's first home. Today, the second year of her passing is past:

**

The Blue House on Sherman Street


My father was talking tonight

About the Blue House on Sherman Street,

“Where Mom & I lived, with her folks,
After we got married…”

It was up the road, from the Lake,
And I remember being there as a child;
Visits, long after they’d found an apartment,
And, settled into a house,
And, had three kids:
One of which,
Was me.

How it is,
Houses
Stay with you,
As you carry them forward,
Tentatively, like those newly married,
~~If only, re-living~~
Or, basking in Sunlight, on a Summer’s Day.

I’ve given an ear to my Pop tonight,
And, among his Stories, I heard:

The closing of another Chapter…The memory, flying backwards…
Only, for a moment,
We were happy there~~
Paired together~~in our remembrances,

Of that Blue House on Sherman Street,
Where the
Beginnings of an end,

Are Cherished.

**

[Take care. I shall see you all again, asap.]

xx,Will.

Friday, September 14, 2007

UPDATE:

Well. They'll have a bed for me on Monday.
They've got me going in for a full work-up.
Leg & foot problems, (related to the Marfans)

The depression (which has worsened, over the last few weeks) will get the attention it needs also.

Friends,
I'll see you when I'm released...





Love,Will.

EDIT: My Latest Podcast:
For my Family & Friends...and, dedicated in Memory, to my Mom (September 16, 2007~~2 years gone, and still a presence.)

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Collapsed :


I'll be going in the hospital.

Wait up for me, k?

Love, Will.

Real. Anniversaries are tough. Breathe. :

It is 4:45 a.m..

In the next room, my father moans in his sleep.
He may not be sleeping, as he moans.

He moans at night,
like a baby, or a wounded bear-cub, with its foot caught in a trap.

He passes his misery on,
as I toss and turn and finally fall
myself~~while awake.

**

Each day, I've tried to move forward.
I've never been as low as I've been the last few days...
...I don't want to leave my bed.

**
Today, I see two doctors.
One is going to talk to me about my depression;
the other, will examine my eyes,
my heart,
my bones,
and, chart where Marfan's syndrome has taken me.

**
Anniversaries are tough.
On Sunday, it will be two years since my mother's death~~
her passing has effected our family in ways unspeakable,
and ever-lasting (so it seems)....

**

....and, I miss her solidity, her outspokenness.
Everyone, including my father,
knew where they stood, when she was in a room.
She held nothing back,
and, gave up, too quickly....

**

....The air escaping;
the breath,
a fluttering of her heart~~
lifted,

and, gone.

**

Now, I see the circle we've traversed.
There is an opening,
between these moans, this crying.

**
I love the old man, in the next room...
There is no changing him.

In his eyes, I'm still the youngest,

All too real,
at 4:45...

...a.m.

**






Just breathe.

~x~ Will.

~~sexy....yet? ~ ~

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

I'm really getting into this Podcast Thing:


SUGASM # 69...(typo/correction)..., I mean, #96!! :


The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #97? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

Note: Sam’s been working on the Sugasm and it looks like our glitches are fixed. To get the post requests on time you’ll need to subscribe to the Sugasm RSS.

This Week’s Picks
Tips and Sugestions on having sex with me.
“I’m a slut, but I’m an ethical one.”

Wet
“You can smell this wet. It glistens on my thighs.”

A Brief Meeting with the Girl Next Door
“You can pay me by teaching me how you like to be licked.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Stacked Decks

Editor’s Choice
Concentration?

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Beautiful
How To Set Up a MFF/FMF Threesome (and Live)
“Sexual Fantasy # 1″ : For Art’s Sake!”
Tara’s Private Diary: Guilty Pleasures
“We’re just good friends”

NSFW Pics & Videos
Half-Nekkid Footballer
A Jewell in bondage, pantyhose and latex
Pagan Lust
Pamela Anderson Showing Thong in See Through White Clothes
Valerie Vasquez Nude

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Hot House pt. 1
The Missing Sex Scene: Superman
Now
Syncronicity
Theater
To the ground floor
Vivid memories, solo vacation edition

Sex News & Satire
The Great Porn Debate
Half-Nekkid Schoolgirl
Retro Sex Blog Turns 1 Year Old!
What if…? Suzanne’s story

BDSM & Fetish
Catalina loves Sexual Fantasies
Center peace
Full Circle - Part II
Good morning little schoolgirl
Hair
Ring

Sex Work
Labor Day - but not for sex workers?

The Day After :

Brunch was Hell...Pass the Rainwater, please


posted 09/12/07

I thought to myself:
Maybe, I'm bi-polar,

after all~~

just a bit of rush,
waiting to fall,
~~so, unexpected,
like a good, drenching,rain;
the clouds, blooming,

loud,

with thunder.
**
It wouldn't be the first time,
I'd hid from the World. It wouldn't be the last time, either.
The World, at Brunch today,
was invisible. **
At the table, I sat alone,
and had a late lunch. **

For one, stark minute
I felt as if I were minding more than my own business: I could see where I began and ended; Not rising too high, only to fall, but falling alone, nonetheless. ** So many tears in that rain. So many. ** I must be, bi-polar: I thought to myself, today. ~x~ Will.




Sunday, September 9, 2007

Music & Video Monday & Tuesday [9/11/2007] ~ ~ enjoy!


~ For a blogger ....for a hero:

For, all the Heroes in our lives.
For Firemen, Father's,
and, Friends....

Heroes,

all.








~x~ Will.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

For New York.....Remembering the 11th~~six years ago:

(jus' messin' 'round wid YouTube!)

**

~~Don't laugh. They say, Charlie Chaplin started out this way...

...and, I believe it.

Love ya, New York!

[Drop me a comment @ YouTube too!)



~x~ Billy b.

EDIT: 9/8/2007 [2:55 p.m.] :

Here is the audio of The YouTube Video~~[This is a podcast, recorded from my Television, into a telephone (for Gabcast), then tranferred to Podbean. Hence, the Sound-quality sucks.]~~In any event, it'll give you an idea of what My performance sounded like.

Enjoy. I hope.



Yeah, you can subscribe to my Podcast if you'd like.
Yippie! NewYorkBoy! xxoo

PS: I see that someone voted that they "hate" Will the most. It's good to know at least one person hates me!! (LOL!)~~Keep the votes comin!!!!! (Boo!)

Thursday, September 6, 2007

"Sexual Fantasy # 1" : For Art's Sake!"

If I were a true Artist, I wouldn't have to resort to stealing.

And so, the "fantasy" is simple: Reveal your wanderings, and reveal a bit of yourself.

Recently, this "New York Boy," had the pleasure of getting a commission, at the MOMA [Museum of Modern Art.] The Head Curator of Acquisitions, Mr.
James Johnston, sent me a letter, informing me that, "The Museum, being a virtual landmark, for years, would be most pleased with showing your Collection, via the Web."

I must say, I was bowled over~ ~("stunned", of course, is a better word; however, bowling has always been a pleasant past-time, and I lean in the direction of literalism, when the use of an adjective is necessary!)

In any event,~~ keeping in mind, that this is entirely "fiction"~~I doffed my Artist's hat, and put on my Artist's Mask, and joyfully gave up any sense of humility...

...ALL in the matter of a half-hour of Web-searching.

I must say, the results of these "wanderings" turned up some extraordinary Works! "The Sexual Themes of the Artist's Work," proclaimed WebARTS Magazine, "Is bound to cause giggles & wet panties for Years To Come."

Simon Schama, Professor of Art History at Columbia University, wrote, "The first word which comes to mind, while viewing this outrageous collection is:
PILFERAGE."

His review, in ARTWEEK, went on to conclude: "If anything, NewYorkBoy's Collection, inspired me to investigate the life of Caravaggio."

Needless to say, The Web-Show was shut down, after one day of viewings.

[the site, I believe, exceeded the "search-engine HIT LIST" numbers at Google; caused 3,000 computers, nationwide, to crash unexpectedly; and, if that were not enough, caused power outages, (for the week of August 25th, 2007) throughout the Metropolitan Area~~including, Queens & Nassau County)

~~all of which, keep in mind, is fabrication (For Art's Sake!)~~

So..yes! I admit it. I confess!
I stole the images!

I claimed them as a legitimate "Collection" of Major artists, and used some of my own photographs, to create this impression. [What to do now!

....It was all a fantasy; a dream..So sexy, though. Larry Flint, of Hustler Magazine said, "The Hell with naughty Senators! Give me New York Boy's Collection. "

(I refused his offer.)

Instead, (all-the-above, lies, of course) I went to "Smilebox" and had a "Virtual Art Gallery Made."

Ahhhh, FANTASY....It's HOT!

Enjoy.

xx,Will [aka: NewYorkBoy]











Click to play | Make your own Smilebox

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

"The Only Thing We Have To Fear...

...Is Fear Itself."



Happy Hump Day, Friends.

~X~ Bill.

Untitled :


I can glimpse my prospects
half-heartedly,
now:

There is no better cure
than humility;
calling me to the carpet,

as if I were miles away,
on a cliff, or bridge~~

praying for flight,

while expecting to

jump.

**


I am happier living,

untitled.






With Love,
Will

For New York...For My Grandmother...For a Song:

I've been thinking about my Grandmother.
Lady Liberty welcomed her here.
~~Her plaque: "Don't Worry It May Never Happen" inspired this short film.
Feel free
to leave a shout out, at YouTube. (All comments are welcome.)

It may seem like nothing much, but
each small second holds
a memory.

Don't worry....Be Happy, the song said.
New York...New York.









Edit: For anyone who's taken an interest, I've just posted "Episode Two" of "Sexual Nostalgia" ["Maximus Chance: POV"] here: "CLICK"

xx,Will.

Saturday, September 1, 2007

Will,will be back on September 5th,2007 :


In The Meantime:
Enjoy the music! Dig?






Love yez, Bill. (EDIT: Realized there is a place for me in this Universe..whether on the 16th, or earlier....)